I'm starting a Haines thread with this massive post because I think he is brilliant and other people might too. So we can go and see him on the Literary stage. On Friday, I think.

He's operated now under four different names: The Auteurs are great; Black Box Recorder are great; Baader Meinhof are great; Luke Haines is great.

Luke Haines' website announced his Latitude presence thusly: Luke Haines reading from ‘Bad Vibes’ and strumming a guitar. Luke Haines at a music festival in England in the Summer. Feel his pain people.

Mr Haines has written a book - Bad Vibes - about the Britpop days. Very good it is too. No doubt some of the forum members are thinking "But that doesn't apply to me. I am the first of the hip young gunslingers", but they will learn a lot from this book.

Now that Mr David Peace has had to withdraw, this is the next best thing. Mr Haines has written a song based upon a Peace book, and has supported him on tour. Peace returns the favour by bunging a quote onto Haines' book. Best seller status guaranteed.

The sleevenotes to Das Capital: The Songwriting Genius Of Luke Haines (incidentally, the greatest sleeve notes of all time) suggest a spat with the Chapman brothers. Maybe it was all imagined, or maybe they will fight it out at Latitude.

If you think this post is awful and tiresome, think about what Haines probably thinks.

What I'm asking is: Is anyone else excited about seeing Mr Haines, and would anyone else care to share their thoughts? If this thread sinks with no response I will not mind.

I'm very much looking forward to seeing him. Bad Vibes is a great read and The Auteurs/his other combos were occasionally brilliant. I suspect i will find the man himself to be an utter c**t if the book is anything to go by, but that's all part of life's rich tapestry innit.

I have never met the man, but I would imagine him to actually be very affable in person. He knows what he wants people to think of him, and he knows how to make them think it. There is no greater art.

If nothing else, this thread has made me VERY determined to find out who this guy is!

The funniest bit in the book was Noel Gallagher being repeatedly and insisitently lovely to him.

I'm looking forward to this as well, though would love to know what it clashes with.

Does he really live in Buenos Aires now?

I always knew Noel was a good egg. He is probably the only Britpop star who escapes unscathed from the book. Even St Jarvis Cocker comes in for a bit of a bashing, but probably only cos he was charting higher at the time. I hope he reads the bits about Thom Yorke (I can't remember them at the moment but I'm sure they were funny). He is not nice at all about Damon Albarn.

It is annoying that the time hasn't been confirmed. I assume it's Friday because that's what's on the Haines website. If it clashes with Duckworth Lewis is Fever Ray there will be murder.

I can not believe that he lives in Buenos Aires. Now, Rio...that's a rumour I could get behind.

What does he have to say in the book about Lawrence (Denim)???

I have the book within grasping distance, and as Chapter One involves a gig supporting Felt I can provide some interpretation. He thinks that Lawrence is a hilariously self-important idiot. Amusing anecdote about Lawrence having an entourage and hiding his bald patch. But he says AND I QUOTE "It will be a few years before Lawrence gets good and delivers his neo-glam masterpice Back in Denim".

I would say that there is a level of professional respect and relative warmth for Lawrence. Hope this helps.

ORIGINAL: Thomas

I have the book within grasping distance, and as Chapter One involves a gig supporting Felt I can provide some interpretation. He thinks that Lawrence is a hilariously self-important idiot. Amusing anecdote about Lawrence having an entourage and hiding his bald patch. But he says AND I QUOTE "It will be a few years before Lawrence gets good and delivers his neo-glam masterpice Back in Denim".

I would say that there is a level of professional respect and relative warmth for Lawrence. Hope this helps.

 
Yeah, I'd heard that the impression he gives is that he does respect Lawrence.
 
And he really should do as he ripped off Lawrences 70's ideas at the beginning of the 90's
 
He had some success and Lawrence had none
 
"Back in Denim" by Denim is in my top 3 favourite ever albums and is far far better than anything "he" ever did!!!
 
(I can't bring myself to read his book, although I am tempted now)

Hes probobaly the worst thing i've ever heard.

Hmm, headlining on Sunday, probably clash with Nick Cave or Magazine. Big clash issue, hope it is magically in between sets.

Bump for Thomas's counsel.

Thanks bruv, glad I've been assigned a useful role for the forum at last.

This whole SundayHeadliner-gate affair has placed some pretty stark choices in front of our hearts and eyes. I've not been to Latitude before so I dunno what sort of times these things happen. I can't see them having the Literary stage going on as late as the main stage so hopefully a Nick Cave clash will be avoided. It is bound to clash with something I want to see on Uncut tho. The Tricky - St Etienne - Magazine consecutivity is one of the highlights of the lineup for this forum member (i.e. me). I suppose I have to go to Haines really, even if he is just reading from out of a book.

This literally the stuff of nightmares; I predict I will be waking up in a cold sweat...looking at my watch, time 3 AM...fist shaking at the sky...still no closer to understanding what is happening.

If anyone does know what time the Literary headliners are on, that would be very helpful. Thanks.

Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it.

ORIGINAL: Thomas

Thanks bruv, glad I've been assigned a useful role for the forum at last.

This whole SundayHeadliner-gate affair has placed some pretty stark choices in front of our hearts and eyes. I've not been to Latitude before so I dunno what sort of times these things happen. I can't see them having the Literary stage going on as late as the main stage so hopefully a Nick Cave clash will be avoided. It is bound to clash with something I want to see on Uncut tho. The Tricky - St Etienne - Magazine consecutivity is one of the highlights of the lineup for this forum member (i.e. me). I suppose I have to go to Haines really, even if he is just reading from out of a book.

This literally the stuff of nightmares; I predict I will be waking up in a cold sweat...looking at my watch, time 3 AM...fist shaking at the sky...still no closer to understanding what is happening.

If anyone does know what time the Literary headliners are on, that would be very helpful. Thanks.

Life is unfair, kill yourself or get over it.

Last year Dave Gorman clashed with Interpol, I guess Haines will clash with Cave.

I can't really miss Nick Cave headlining a festival in order to go on my own to watch a surly man read from a book that I've already read.

Have to hope I catch him next time I'm down Boca way. Or that Latitude bump the bill or timings around in the meantime.

I will probably just go in the hope and expectation that I will be the only person there. 

Imagine the contempt he'd feel for you.

Oh, you already were.

We'd get on so well, if only he'd give me the chance. 

I can get all the self-loathing I need just by realising how much time I've spent on this forum.

Well, it's one way of announcing you can't make it

That is amazing. I won't be bidding.